It's A Wonderful Life

So I really should have put something on here on Thanksgiving but I thought was really original and things have been super busy. The day after Thanksgiving my family has a tradition that means so much to me. My mom, dad, brother, and I all set up the Christmas stuff.

When I say Christmas stuff, I don't mean a tree and a few lights. In our attic 11 months of the year we some how store an entire house up there. We change our mugs, OUR MUGS! And towels.... and wall hangings.... and pillows.....yeah.... everything. We have this old manger scene that I would set out for as long as I can remember. I am not sure why it means so much to me but when I see it I feel like it is the most important thing we set out.

Now this changing of the house takes a full day. Tradition is for lunch we order pizza and once we finish we watch It's A Wonderful Life. I could have an entire blog on classic Christmas movies. Not the weird new ones cough*Elf*cough sorry but in my personal opinion Will Ferrell can't play any other character and it really isn't that funny.

It's A Wonderful Life is the classic Christmas, as a kid it is really hard to grasp it. I have watched it at least once for the past 19 years and not until I got older did I really learn to appreciate it. George Bailey realizes he is not in control of his life. He doesn't get the dream job he wanted, nor does he get to travel the world. But unknowingly he touched so many lives, just being himself. He didn't expect anything, it was just an instinct to help people.

Life is incredible, life is wonderful. Thank God for being in charge of my life because I might know what I want but in the end I know he is in charge. No matter what happens to me He knows what is best.

OSA

It is mid November and I already have my summer job! That's right, I already have a job for May and June. I will be the Orientation Student Assistant. I was so excited when I found out. I was against 52 other people for 15 positions and I got the job. When I opened my acceptance letter I stood in the mail room for about a minute and a half with my mouth wide open. I am sure I looked like an idiot but do I care? Um no, because I WILL BE WORKING! I really need to go run laps because I am so happy right now it is crazy! College is such a blessing, I am getting so much out of this experience and today was a great example of that.

The Reason I Started a Blog

I give up on not writing in this. The whole reason I started this blog was to find the happy parts of my day and I have fallen so short on this lately. And today was in no doubt a challenge.

I am the type of person that has to do something, all the time. If I start feeling bad, that will not stop me. Well for the past three weeks I have been trying to get a cold (I think, I have finally cracked and will be going to the doctor tomorrow) and apparently if you don't either A) get sick or B) take the medicine even after the symptoms are gone you will continue getting sick. My voice is so scratchy and it hurts to talk, play my instrument, eat, and of course especially, sing. I have a singing test tomorrow, what are the odds right? I have great respect for that professor and I emailed him asking if I could do it in a couple days just until I get my voice back.

I am still not sure what I expected as a response, but it told me it was no problem and to just feel better. I mean I did ask for the time, but just having a college professor that is willing to set up a time for you to retake something just amazes me. I was just about to go into a practice room and try to go over my quiz material again (every time I practiced it I lost my voice or started coughing so badly I couldn't get through a line). My day no longer classifies as a bad day. A bad day is when literally nothing goes right. As I said before months ago- there is no such thing as a BAD day, just not perfect ones.

Chill in the Air

The weather is finally nice (knock on wood). Mid 60s, LOVE IT! I love the cold weather, I love being able to go to all of my classes in a hoodie, I love going to marching band and not feeling gross afterwards, I just love so much about cold weather!

Constants

My life is unpredictable. I have always learned to be flexible because you never know what can come up. I have one constant that I can depend on week after week. My Sundays!

I can always count on great Sundays. Grant picks me up every Sunday so we can go to church together. Ironically before I ever came to college that was one of my biggest worries about coming to college was if I was going to go to church every Sunday. I am so thankful for this constant in my life because I rely on it and need it every week.

Participation

Tonight is my high school band's UIL marching band night. So this post is for my high school band.

I was a member of the greatest high school band in the world. No band can ever compare! Best high school band anyone could ever see. What is so unique is when I say best, I do not mean it as we were the best marchers, musicians, or got the top scores at contests. No no no no. I was in a band the was in it for the students, the kids that needed the band. Even if the kids weren't that good musically they got the opportunity to put on a uniform and represent the school. Don't get the impression that we preformed bad, normally we got top scores at contests but the band director made a distinct point that the scores are not what we are after.

The band director there is incredible. To be in an area where so many directors all the care about is UIL, going to state, 1st place at a contest, etc. he is one of the few that wants band to teach kids something in life. It cared about the individual kids, if there was a problem he wanted to hear about it and he would help that student. The more I type the harder I realize it is to describe this so I will put it in a few stories.

My junior year I was section leader, and at the very beginning of the marching season a hurricane hit in East Texas. So because of that hurricane a girl who should have been drum major and band president at her high school got was moved to my band. My band director made it a point that she got a spot to march (we already had all the spots assigned) since he knew it was possible she wasn't going to march with her band and when he found out that she was moving back to her high school to help build the band he offered to sponsor her band and gave her the opportunity to march in our UIL show at a contest so she could do one last contest. Very few band directors would ever do that, they would never let someone march who would not be there to perform at UIL because they wanted someone else to learn it, someone that would be there. But he knew that this last opportunity to compete means a lot to her and that meant more to him then a ranking.

My senior year we had a student in a wheelchair come into the band (also in my section). During section leader training week the band director told us this kid was coming and was going to be march. What he said next will forever stick with me "I know there is a possibility that this could lower ours scores, but this kid has a better attitude and personality then everyone of you in here and he is GOING to march. If someone has a problem with it talk to me but I will not change my mind on this." That kid marched, well more of moved his wheelchair from spot to spot but he was the best freshman we got that year.

This band includes everyone, it is a home for hundreds of high school kids and has changed so many lives. Not only does it include people like that, but they are really good! I have not seen another band that can have both participation from everyone and be a UIL 1 level band. No matter what kind of kid they are- sporty, nerdy, shy, outgoing, trouble makers, literally anyone can say that they were a member of one of the best marching bands.

It changed my life in so many ways. I could write forever on what that band has done for me but I met Grant there. Without the band I don't know how I would have ever met my best friend and I really need Grant's support. It also encouraged my decision to be a music major because I saw in that band hundreds of kids who once high school was over were never going to touch there instruments again but they learned a lot being a part of something so great.

A Complete Stranger and a Sister

If you have gotten anything out of this blog about me you know that I love music, my major, my family, and I am a very loyal member to Tau Beta Sigma. Today I was able to facebook chat with with a Sigma from my sorority that graduated in 1998. Apparently she used to babysit me when I was younger and she was in my dad's youth group back in 1994.

I have fallen in love with this sorority and my dad told me that he knew someone who was in my chapter years ago, who was actually president. I friended her on facebook told and have been talking about TBS. She is so passionate about it and what we stand for. It makes me wonder am I going to feel that way 15 years from now? Will I still have the connections I have made with these wonderful people?

She was telling me about all the traditions she helped start and traditions that were just starting. It is amazing how much this chapter has grown. Even though we don't seem like two people on facebook that shouldn't have a special connection we do. Even though we were involved in TBS at different times, we both know everything about it. We have different memories, different families but we both are sisters.

I don't know why it amazes me so much but I find it so cool especially when she was talking about small things she started in the chapter that became a major ritual today. Wow. And she didn't even know until I told her. 12 years later. I know I have a while here, but I pray I can look back on this chapter one day and see that I made a difference because they have done so much for me already.

Singing with Iota

Before I address anything I know I am a fail at writing in this everyday. I think I am going to have to change this to as much as possible instead of daily because I just don't have the time some days to write something interesting.

Baylor game..... That was not a happy moment for me.

But that is not what I wanted to blog about. Instead it was the moments following the game. The sorority I am in Tau Beta Sigma went onto the field after the game and joined Baylor's chapter. After going through such a horrible game it was incredible to see two opposing schools join hands at the 50, where our teams momentarily were fighting.

We were friends, sisters, all together. It was a symbol that no matter what happened during the game we held nothing against one another. There had been so much trash talk between the two schools but we were able to put aside our differences and join together in our similarities- "for greater bands".

Skyping with Hannah

Many years ago I met a girl in church who completely changed my life. Her name was Hannah. I didn't know that 11 years later Hannah would still be in my life nor did I know we would be such great friends.

You know those characters on movies were their best friend lives right next door to each other and instead of calling they just run over to their house to ask about their day? Well that was Hannah and my relationship along with Caitlin. We were an inseparable group. We laughed, cried, shared each others burden. Those two girls I know will be with me for the rest of my life, all the trials we have been through together and we still are friends I have concluded that nothing can split us up.

It is so hard to put into words what we have all been through together but I appreciate those girls so much. I admire there strength. We all have had different challenges come our ways but I am so proud of those wonderful women. No matter what goes on with them they sit and listen to my problems. I almost feel sick complaining but they want to share my burden. Mine is so different and so weak compared to theirs. That is the truest friendship.

I could write for hours about all the adventures I have had with them. All the trouble we've caused (mainly Hannah and I with Caitlin telling us not to get into trouble), the countless sleepovers, movie nights, debates involving Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter. Today we no longer live on the same street, we actually haven't for many years now. But our friendship is still strong. Hannah has lived in Oklahoma for a while now so I no longer run to her house after I finish my homework. Today I got to Skype her which is the next best thing to actually having her back in Texas. We talked about everything new that was going on, update each other on how our past problems were turning out.

I may no longer have that movie perfect friendship with my best friend living right next door, but I have to say I have not seen a movie with a friendship that can withstand as much as the bond between Caitlin, Hannah, and I have. So in my book I have a friendship that is better then the picture perfect movie friendship.

Love Like Crazy

I have been going through a country music phase for a while now. There is just something about it that allows people to relate to it. It tells a story not a dramatic scene that is absurd and overused. Today I finally purchased one of my favorite songs Love Like Crazy by Lee Brice.

The song is about a couple that despite all odds turned into extremely successful people. They are asking them how they did it, and the response is what really gets me-

Be a best friend, tell the truth
And overuse "I love you"
Go to work, do your best
Don't outsmart your common sense
Never let your prayin' knees get lazy
And love like crazy

Life is simple, as long as you do your best things will work out. Maybe never to plan, but they work out eventually. When things get rough or don't follow to my plans I know that everything that begins to lack in my life is everything Lee Brice put in the chorus. This song is such a great reminder to me that no matter what goes on everything works out.

Night Class

Similar to my first semester of college last year I have a night class once a week. From good ol' 6-8:40 p.m. Lovely right? Well it has a core credit I need so I signed up for it. Today I had my first class of this Intro into Anthropology business and it went a lot better than I expected.

The teacher is quirky (but I expected that) and was under the delusion that everyone in his class is really interested in his subject. Honestly, I took it for the core credit but I didn't have the heart to tell him. What was awesome is that a good third of the class is all band students! I did not expect that at all. Those three hours every Thursday night just got so much better.

Now that I actually type that out I realize how dumb this all sounds, but whatever. It made my day even though it seems silly but it's things like that which make college a blast.

The Horrid Heat

Towards the end of summer camp I definitely did my fair share of complaining about it and when I got back to civilization I continued with my fair share of complaining about the hard parts of my summer. What I really can't get over though is how much stronger of a person I am.

Today was one of the hottest days at practice and I figured that my summer camp 'being fit' feel was gone. The first 15 minutes were rough but after that I was so energetic. I was hardly sweating, I was dashing back to my spot, I have never felt so awake during practice. What on earth has camp done to me (though I must say I really like this change)?

While a good majority of the band was getting dehydrated and sore, I was just becoming more energetic. Normally I would be the one starting to feel sluggish and step out for a second. But I honestly feel like I need to go run another mile with all the extra energy I have now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think this is a sign I need to work out more often...... probably should think about putting that in my regular schedule.

Laundry Right Out of the Dryer

I can't be one of the only people who loves laundry right out of the dryer. Not only does it smell really good but it is warm and fluffy! Laundry might be a pain to do and take forever but it is worth it when I finally pull it out of the dryer. I guess I had some sort of obsession with it today because I did three loads of laundry. It does help that the washers and dryers are on the same floor as my room. If this is going to be a new obsession of doing laundry all the time instead on once a week I guess that's not a bad thing.

Joe

So I felt my life flash before my eyes today. I have my orchestra audition tomorrow morning and wind symphony audition Tuesday. Of course today was going to be the day my clarinet breaks!

I am pretty sure time froze once I realized it was broken. No matter how hard I work something that simple could wreck my audition. I had a minor emotional break down. Once I finally got a grip on myself and came to my senses I called my parents and they gave me the phone number to the clarinet repairman I have used all the way through high school.

Joe (the clarinet repairman) listened to my situation and gave me his home address to bring my clarinet to. My dad then drove down all the way from Allen, picked me up, drove to Joe's and within 20 minutes of walking into Joe's house he had my clarinet repaired! Not only was it fixed in time for my audition tomorrow but Joe didn't charge me for it either!

I could breath again, finally! I was so scared for those few hours and like always everything turned out ok. I guess I will never learn.

Grant is Here!

Grant is here! Grant is here! Grant is here! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I haven't seen him since I have moved in. It was such a surprise to have him drive down and see me. I had a band event late but right as I was leaving the pep rally I turn back and see him walking towards me. I love it here at school but I missed him so much. This week has been really hectic so we hadn't had the chance to really talk about how things had been now that we are back at school. We walked to Yo and got to talk about everything. I don't think I had talked so much all week. Not only is he the love of my life but my best friend and I really missed my best friend.

The Clarinet Section

I love being part of such a quirky section. They have really made my day and reminded me why I missed this place so much. Band camp is such a blast because of them.

I had full intentions to write more but I am exhausted, I will write more tomorrow.

Fitness

I have never been 'in shape'. But I realized that today at band camp I am actually doing pretty well. Normally I am sweating and feeling gross on the first day. Today was the first day of marching band, and I wasn't tired at all. I might have been tired of summer camp but I never would have realized that it put me in shape. Thank goodness too. I feel so incredibly confident about myself which rarely happens!

Summer in a Nutshell

I apologize greatly for my fail at writing on this in so long. Camp got crazy and life just doesn't slow down to allow me to type everything I would want to. So instead of typing a ton of blog posts I am just going to summarize it here then be back on track to my one a day blog post!

Camp was a lot of fun, it was a unique job and I will say I learned a lot. I ended up teaching leatherwork and basketry. It was a much better fit for me than office work. Whenever a kid tells me that I am their favorite teacher or a scoutmaster tells me that I am doing a really good job is so much more rewarding compared to filing paperwork. This summer had it's ups and downs but looking back on it now that I have finished camp it was worth it. I am not sure if I will do it again (just because I need a 'real' job that applies to my major) but I have learned a lot about the real world and have developed a new sense of patience. It's really hard to describe everything that happened there, I guess it's something you have to experience to understand.

Now I am back in at school! YAY! I have missed it so much. This is also the first day of band camp! It is so nice to see everyone again and be back in a place where I feel comfortable and have air conditioned showers (I HATED that about summer camp, showers that our outside without air conditioning are disgusting). It's hard to believe that a year ago I was the scared little freshman coming here and now on my first day as a Sophomore I am more comfortable coming back here then I ever was going back to high school year after year. God has blessed me with some incredible people in my life that have really helped me feel so comfortable here.

Go

It was the very beginning of blue card day in the office. If any of you know what that means you should feel sorry for me. I am in charge of every single blue card… there are at LEAST 4 cards per kid and over 700 kids. That is a lot of blue cards. I was alone printing blue cards at 10:00 p.m. I had never done blue cards before and it has already been a long day when my boss comes out of his office at 11:45

Boss: “Where’s the other office worker?”

Me: “Meeting” (I am almost in tears from stress)

Boss: “Go to bed.”

Me: “What?”

Boss: “Give Grant a kiss goodnight and go to bed. The other office worker should have started this earlier, it’s not your problem.”

I am not even allowed to hold Grant’s hand here and my boss told me kiss him goodnight! What was that about? I didn’t question it, I got out of there as fast as I could and once I made it to the road I collapsed. I was exhausted and still in shock about my boss taking pity on me. I hadn’t complained once but he apparently wasn't crazy enough to keep me working. 

Someone Going Out of Their Way

One of the many jobs in the office is too sort the mail. For some odd reason they drop all the mail off in the office but the scoutmasters pick it up in the adult training center two football fields away. Apparently I get to do the mail single handedly and we had a LOT of mail today. There were around five bags that were half my height and an armful of letters. As I was making my third trip up to the Adult Training Center, Donnie, the guy who runs the kitchen drove up in a gator with one of his staff. The staff member stepped out, let me in, we picked up the rest of the mail, and then they carried all of it in for me. That was definitely not in their job description but they went out of their way to help me. I have done so much work today I was getting a little annoyed at how much I was doing. Then someone who had no reason to help me did. I needed help but I didn’t even have to ask. My hard work does not go unnoticed and there are plenty of people at my job willing to help even if it is not their responsibility. Donnie had great timing too, it was at the exact moment I was thinking “why am I the only one doing this?” then he drove up. He wasn’t what I expected at all but I am proud to say I was wrong and people actually do care.

Nutter Butters

“I am sitting in the middle of the national forest, licking the middle out of some Nutter Butters and I realize my life is wonderful. Not because of what I do but because I am eating Nutter Butters. It’s the little things in life.”  ~ Grant

I had another rough day but every day at around 11p.m. Grant and I have ‘tea time’ where we talk, drink tea, and eat cookies. Today was Nutter Butters and as I was whining about my day we were eating the peanut butter out of the cookies. It really made me stop and think after Grant said that. The whole point of this blog is to hold onto the little things, not whine about my day. What is the point of whining? That will get me nowhere in life. I needed to be talking about how I wrote several letters, how I helped several kids fix their schedules and how it put a smile on my face when a scoutmaster remembers me as ‘Ms. TCU’. Without internet it makes it harder to blog so I have been forgetting about my goal. Thank you Grant for reminding me that my life is wonderful because I was licking the center out of Nutter Butters.

The Illegal Hug

I am having a hard time at camp but today that hug made my day. Being at a BSA camp I am not allowed to touch anyone, no putting my hand on their shoulder when someone’s upset, no hugs when I have a bad day- especially from the campers. Today was not going well for me at all and I felt so sick because of allergies. I went to pick up my lunch and bring it back to the office when I saw a kid from my old church. He ran up to me and gave me the biggest hug with the widest grin I had ever seen.

I could get in trouble for even writing that I got a hug from a camper but for whoever knows this kid they would know he can’t greet you any other way. He is a little slow mentally but I have never met a happier kid. He smiles ALL the time and gives out hugs freely to those who need them but I don’t think he understood how much I had needed it.

Lysandra's Recital

I finished off my senior year with my senior recital. I believe that it was the best way for me to say good bye, to start this new chapter in my life. That day will be one moment I will forever cherish and be proud of. Even though I have been stuck in Oklahoma when Lysandra's recital was about to begin I knew I wanted to be there for her.

The drive was long, but I made it in time to hear her recital. I am so proud of her. So many years of practicing, performing, stress, and just everything. She has finally wrapped up her high school chapters and is about to start on a whole new chapter. It was awesome to see someone in the same position I was in just a year ago. Best of luck to you Lysandra and I get to head back to Oklahoma after spending 18 hours in Texas!

The Letter

I got my first camp letter today! I really doubt I will get many more but it still made me feel pretty cool. What has definitely been keeping me from getting too homesick has been writing letters to everyone. I have now written over 20 letters and I have had way too much fun doing it. I am pretty sure that less than half the people I am writing to will write back but I am still having a blast doing it. That is what I did during my First Aid class, because honestly the stuff that was taught was common sense so I wrote around six letters. Yay for pen and paper being able to make someone’s day.

Air Conditioning

Oklahoma wilderness is hot outside, just thought you would like to know that. But I luckily am working in the air conditioning because I am in the office doing paperwork. So I am extremely thankful for the nice cool breeze that I get to enjoy that most of staff does not.

That is not the main thing that has made me happy these past few days though. What has truly made my weeks was I sent out a request for addresses because as you can tell from ‘Monday’s’ post I was extremely lonely. I got a FLOOD of addresses! That made my day! I have been writing every single person and having so much fun doing it.

I think the staff here thinks I am nuts because of it but I don’t care. I have people that want to hear from me and they are just jealous that they don’t have people like that to write to! God has blessed me with some of the most amazing people in my life and I am thankful for every single one. I am more homesick here than I ever was at school but all the encouragement I have received from everyone has really lifted my spirits.

First Day of Work

First day in Oklahoma and I am having a major ‘I miss Fort Worth’ attack. The people here are nice, but it is so weird coming here and knowing practically no one. This will be an interesting summer.

Positive notes….. well we got blue jello with Swedish fish in them, I thought that was kinda cute. Totally felt like a little kid eating it. Also I bought myself a cheap watch for this job. It is an obnoxiously bright pink which makes me very happy (except it beeps on the hour which is really really annoying). Another little thing that made me smile was I have a ton of pictures saved on my computer. I just finished flipping through them and I smiled more during that then I probably did for most of the day. I know I will have fun this summer, I just need to get warmed up and ‘in the groove’ of everything. I have so many pictures on here and I will probably post this a lot later because I can’t get my internet to work at all (and a little scared to connect to some random guys unsecured network) but I would like to share a few pictures- mainly because I am bored out of my mind but secondly because they make me happy.

 The main reason I miss Fort Worth these wonderful people right here- the Pink! family

 My Bigs!!!!!

 This picture is just silly and makes me smile every time J

 Pink! family had to go on twice because I love them so much!

 My life would be so incomplete without my Lucky Charms now. We have been through so much together and I am so excited for the times to come with these sisters.

 Right in between Ann Curry and the other guy (I don’t remember his name). Enough said.

 Grant and I after our three year anniversary. We are in the same attire that we wore three years ago. He is here at camp with me! That is the main reason I know I can stick out such a strange job for me is I have him here with me.

Last Day of Summer

I will post a real blog post soon but I really need to go to sleep since I am now wrapping up my last day of summer. I start my summer job tomorrow morning in Oklahoma. So I am saying goodbye to the Lone Star State for a bit. I will hopefully have internet connection at camp so I will update this when I can (no promises).

Nonchord tone for the day- late night Walmart runs.... you never know what kind of trouble you can cause!

Kayaking

So today Grant surprised me with a trip to the lake and he taught me to kayak. It was so much fun and so relaxing to be out on the lake. I am not bad at it either (for the first time to kayak). As we were pulling the kayaks out of the water my dumb crocs got stuck in the mud. I am extremely sorry if you are a fan of crocs but I hate those shoes and am disappointed I even own a pair (long story). It was hysterical though, I couldn't walk because there was so much mud in my shoes. Loved it! I looked like a total dork because I kept slipping in my own shoes.

A New World of Crafting

My birthday is around a month away but I will be gone at work, so my mother took me shopping for my birthday present. I got a Cricut! I am way too excited and I still can't get it to work yet. But that doesn't matter right now. I HAVE A CRICUT!

After shopping with my mother we went and got lunch with her at P.F. Changs. That was sooooo good! I have not had decent Americanized Chinese food in a long time (we even got free orange chicken!). Basically everything was good about today and I could go on forever but I really need to get a normal sleep schedule before summer camp.

The Contract

I have always believed my family to be strange, odd, and a little enthusiastic but today I have come to terms that my family my not be that unique in that sense or Grant's family is the same way.

I went over to Grant's house for dinner tonight and somehow managed to make it right when his youngest two sisters were talking about cracking eggs on each other's heads. The older of the two eventually exclaimed "I will give you $100 to crack three eggs on your head!" Soon she was talked down to two eggs on the foot. This is not the amusing part though. It was the writing of th contract.

The younger of the two wrote out a very detail, very long contract saying along the lines of 'two eggs on the foot, not the leg, knee, or any other HUMAN body part, had to be out of their dad's fridge, the eggs had to crack." It was 98% loophole free. Each girl was bringing in lawyers (aka Grant and their dad), the contract was signed and then had to be given to a mutual party. I learned more about law in contracts then I ever did in my Criminal Justice class (which we did study court). It was hysterical- the dramatic writing of a contract.

Well just to tell you how it ended- the only loophole was that AN egg (not both) had to crack on her foot, both had to crack but not on her foot.... So you can imagine how that ended up. I am pretty sure they are setting up a full court system right now but I am not positive. It was great though to see them get so into it, totally made my day! Whenever my brother and I have a disagreement we never right up a contract, but that is an idea and I might have to try it sometime.

Flashbacks

Well I don't have a lot to say today but I guess what was a good part about my life or something I thought was interesting was the many flashbacks I have had today. Everyone has part of their life that was hard. Today I had many of those memories come swarming back at me and it makes me proud. Proud to know I have come out of that part of my life so much stronger and so much happier. I may have hated that time in my life, but I wouldn't trade it for anything because it has helped turn me into a better person.

It's the End of the World!

Not really, but I thought that should be documented. So sorry geniuses, you will never be able to predict the end of the world. But the poor human being that thought today was the end never did read the full Bible particularly Matthew 24:36 "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." So sorry geniuses, you will never be able to predict the end of the world.

That is my small musing of that but today what was special to me was today was my mom's annual piano recital. My mom teaches piano and taught me for twelve years. This is the first year that I didn't play- I kinda enjoyed it. I always loved playing piano but I needed a break, a good long break. So for a change I got to sit in the audience and listen to everyone play. The best part was when I got to see my old piano students perform. I had 7 old piano students and 5 went on to take from my mother so I got to hear them play. I am so proud of them and miss teaching them so much. They helped me find what I want to do with my life- teach music privately to kids. They were the highlights of my weeks and just a joy to teach. I am meant to be a teacher, I might not be great at piano but I miss teaching piano so much. And a little cockiness in me wants to say I was good at it, I was a pretty good student teacher, but it helped with having perfect students.

Another part of the recital that meant a lot to me was hearing my mom play a piece she arranged for my grandfather. He has always loved Down Yonder so she arranged it as a piano duet and played it with my brother. I will probably do a full blog post on this another day because I have had an allergy headache all day and I finally took some benadryl. The headache is gone but I am getting really loopy and it is very difficult to type and I am about 2 minutes away from not making any sense at all.

"The world can't end today- it's already tomorrow in Australia."

Home for a Bit

Finally home from Kansas, it was a great trip but it is nice to be home for a bit. It was a fun car ride and we made it back in good time.

My internet is being dumb so this will be a fairly quick one but what I want to talk about in this post was when I got to talk to my brother. I have a younger brother and we have this relationship that we can never admit to one another that we like each other but we get along really well. Today we were talking about some teachers he has and just the goofy things that go one at middle school. He is in 8th grade and has to do a project that I did when I was in 8th grade (he has to pretend he is a Jew, get Visas from other teachers, and get out of the country). So we were telling stories about that project and that teacher. I really enjoyed that. I don't talk to my brother a lot but I have a lot of respect for the person I see him becoming. He claims he doesn't miss me at school, but that's really hard to believe when I get a phone call from him asking how to do that project and then he asks what classes he should take and if the teachers are any good. We continued to talk about ways he could annoy the percussion director at the middle school and come up with pranks. I must be such a wonderful influence on him.

Farkle

As I mentioned yesterday I have had a break through. Grant has been cheating at Farkle and I can prove it! Hopefully he will not read this until he takes me home to Texas or this could be a long car ride home for me back to Texas but I am too proud not to share right now.

Farkle is a game with six dice and has a bunch of rules and is really hard to explain without getting confused. But my point through this is it is a dice game, a game of CHANCE. So there is no way he should be beating me in this game by over 5,000 points. I made the prediction he is cheating, I cannot prove how (I believe it is his set of dice) but something is fishy.

His grandmother and I taunted him the entire time about how he is possibly cheating. Together we came up with ways to test our hypothesis:

First day of Farkle, we played with her different sets of dice: I had the blue, Grant had the black, and she had the green. I won that game and Grant claims it was because he was not using his set of dice.

The next day he thought he played with his set of dice when actually we swapped the dice from a different Farkle set in his container. He lost yet again!

Yesterday we swapped the dice back (he still doesn't know we did this) and he managed to kill us! The first time on this trip he actually used his dice and he didn't know it. I find this weird. I do not actually believe that the love of my life would actually cheat but it's the little things- his grandmother and I coming up with these elaborate plans to find out why he is winning at Farkle, is what made today so wonderful. Sorry Grant for calling you a cheater, but now that you know we swapped the dice you have to admit it looks a little suspicious.

Spoiled

Today was momentous because I believe I have officially proven that Grant cheats at Farkle! If you have never played it is a dice game that is basically ALL chance but he manages to win every time (if we use his dice). I would love to type about this more but I am going to test my theory once more tomorrow before I draw my conclusion.

Along with me (hopefully) finally proving that Grant is cheating at this game everything else that has happened today has been very similar to the rest of this trip. I have been spoiled more then I deserve and more.

I was super excited today because I got to see my G-Big, Ashley! Even though the weather was gross we still toured Fort Scott, got lunch, and looked through several thrift shops in the downtown area. I have missed her so much and it really worked out well that I came up here with Grant so I could see her again. Getting to see her totally made my day but there was still plenty of other things I am extremely thankful for today.

At dinner with Grant and his grandparents we talked for the longest time about some of the strangest things. I don't know why it sticks out to me right now so I feel like I need to write about it. But some how the conversations went from unresolved fifth chords (one of my BIGGEST pet peeves), to strange psychic abilities, hospital trips, and building airplanes in the backyard. It was so funny as we would just tease each other about some of those things (aka Grant and his grandfather would tease his grandmother and I about how we believe that fifth chords should be resolved-which the should be!) It was so much fun and I really enjoyed myself.

So yeah, I am being spoiled beyond belief right now and once I have to leave this vacation I am going to have little time to adapt from this to my soon work life. I am enjoying every second of this and shall not complain, I am so blessed.

Oh What A Beautiful Day....

I've got a beautiful feeling! Everything's going my way!

My mother would come in my room daily when I was younger singing that to get me out of bed in the mornings. Well today I can finally say "Mom I have seen Oklahoma!" Even though I have known the songs for years and years it was one of the few musicals I hadn't seen yet. Grant's grandmother found out that I hadn't seen Oklahoma or Carousal so she went out and rented both. So for the next few weeks I will probably be singing melodies from both.

I have had "a beautiful day" though, with watching Oklahoma and Carousal I have had fun spending the day with Grant and his grandparents. I feel so spoiled though: we went to the homemade waffles for breakfast, Mall Deli for lunch, then musicals, and then homemade ice cream on the back porch. It is so nice to be here, it is so relaxing. Soon my summer job will begin which will take up my entire summer and no longer will I be able to do a lot. Being here is exactly what I need before I go to work. I can not thank Grant and his grandparents enough for letting me come, I am having a blast!

Adventure to Kansas

I again have failed at updated my blog daily. I was up late last night, had already packed away my laptop to be shipped to HP (again), and then my brother was on the computer doing Spanish homework. Hopefully that doesn't count as a total fail to trying to update everyday but I think it was a decent excuse so it makes me feel better.

Today Grant and I went up to Kansas to a place he likes to call "Camp Grandma" (aka visiting his grandparents). It was a long drive up here but so much fun. We drove on Route 66 (AND DIDN'T GET STUCK!!!!), stopped at a neat cafe, and even stopped at a 'ghost town'. There was probably more to the trip but I am tired and having a hard time putting together sentences right now but basically I had a blast just getting here.

Then Grant's cousins came over. It was so different compared to my family. There was still craziness but a very different kind of craziness. His cousins were quite a bit younger, and the one that was around 4 stuck to me like glue. She was adorable but I was allowed to do nothing else. We colored, played hide and seek, played doctor, and whatever this 4 year old could come up with. I was going to put some quotes from her but sadly I can't remember them right now so I might just post them tomorrow.

Officially Summer

Grant finally came back from UNT! Finally! I was about to go crazy, I can find only so much to do without having someone to talk to all the time. So my insanity of boredom will hopefully go away for now. Super short blog post but I am tired and have a lot on my mind.

Seeing What I Left Behind

My internet has been acting up all day so hopefully I can get this posted today. But today was so much fun.

I have been the newbie all year at school so today I visited my old high school. I might have only been gone one year but when I went back for the morning I felt so old. It was so neat going back. I never really thought that people would remember me. I just figured when I would graduate from high school I would just be forgotten instantly. The moment I walked into the band hall, I heard my name called out by at least 5 people who all ran up and gave me a hug. So many people I didn't know I had impacted were so excited to see me, I had honestly thought they didn't care. Not that they didn't care about me, I know they care about me, I just never believe they cared so much to jump out of there chairs and dash towards me. It's an awesome feeling because I really do believe I have left a legacy at that high school. I was never outgoing or really dramatic. All I did was band, I was passionate about it and my goal was to make it the best experience for others. I guess I did a decent job. It was so nice to see everyone and they definitely proved to me that I will not be forgotten.

My aunt is a teacher at my old high school so I then went to her class room and got to talk to her for several hours. It was so fun to talk to her and to see her working at school. She had subbed for several of my classes my junior year at high school but then she got a job else where my senior year. I have always thought she would be an amazing teacher and loved the days she subbed for my classes so I was very excited the day I found out she would be working at my old high school.

When she was on her lunch break I then tried to find some of the teachers that had made the biggest difference in my life while I was there. I first went to find my junior/senior year English teacher but sadly she wasn't there and had a substitute teacher. Anyone who had Mrs. Creelman would agree with me by saying that she was one of the most caring, personal teachers you could ever have. I learned so much from her and has made college English really boring. Mrs. Creelman made us want to learn, she never forced us to learn. She always left it up to our interpretation so we had to go find the answers. Our projects were always so open ended that we actually had to think and put time into them, but because there were so few rules we always ended up with a product that we were very proud of.

I then stopped by the College and Career Center were I was an office aid my senior year. That was such a great deal for me, especially my senior year. My senior year of high school I was deciding between ten schools and I knew what was going to decided for me- money. Working there they gave me so much advice on how to finance for college and they gave me so much support as I was going through those stressful college applications and auditions.

The last teacher I was able to stop by was another one of the few teachers I say impacted me in high school. Mrs. Terry was my World History teacher my sophomore year and I had never seen a teacher so unique but made listening to her lectures the best part of my day. I still remember most of her lectures today because she did such a great job. She had a wonderful sense of humor and my class has so many inside jokes. I would love to write some out here but they wouldn't be as nearly as funny compared to being there three years ago but I will just leave it at she was a interesting character. My cousin is taking World History this year but she didn't end up having Mrs. Terry. I had talked to her and she wasn't doing well so I recommended going to Mrs. Terry's tutoring and my cousin says that helped her so much. That says a lot about a teacher when she will tutor students that aren't hers- without question, she just knew someone was asking for help.

That was all I had time for but if I had the time I would have loved to see my old AP Psychology teacher Mrs. Bost. If something happened to me music wise I would be a psychology major because of this teacher. I had never found a subject that had fascinated me like that (besides music). Her personality reminded me a lot of Mrs. Terry's (she is the one who recommended me to take AP Psychology) so I suppose that helped a lot.

Between the band directors, my friends, Grant, and my teachers (especially those three) when I went to visit the high school I have realized how far I had come since first setting foot on that campus. I don't mean this to sound cocky or full of myself but I am honestly proud of how far I have come. I know I still have a long way to go and three more years left in college, but considering how I started as a freshman in high school I am very proud of how I have matured and all I have accomplished in this short time. If you would have told me even a year ago that I would have the experiences I have had this year I would have honestly thought you were crazy. But it was so possible, it takes hard work and some amazing friends for support.

I am proud that I seem to have left behind a legacy they are keeping alive. I am proud that I was/still am a good influence and they don't mind me visiting. I didn't ever realize how many people looked up to me until I went back to that school for the first time.

Spontaneous Trip to Denton

I believe blogger is being stupid and not letting me update my blog/deleted my old posts so that is rather depressing and then my internet just went down. So sorry this post is coming out so late but here it goes.

Thanks to my wonderful friend Kelleigh I was able to go to Denton for the day to see Grant. He was working most of the day but just getting to see him made it worth it. He was working desk, couldn't leave the building but I didn't care! I was able to talk with him and meet a lot of his friends. Then I even ran into some old friends. It was so nice and so simple. I stood at a front desk, eating pizza, and enjoying watching Grant telling students how to clean there rooms. Another one of the RAs and I amused ourselves by drawing on his binder. I felt like an immature high schooler again. I love the fact that I normally am a fairly mature person (at least I like to think I am) but it is always fun to be immature every once in a while.

After that and I went home my family was watching The Mentalist. I hope not to offend anyone but I do not care for that show. I feel it is just a rip off of Monk. And of course this show was about a murdered musician. I did appreciate a quote when he was suspecting another musician as the killer: "I am looking for the killer...You have all spent your teen years obsessing on little things and practicing scales compared to a social life. A noble pursuit. But as a result it makes you a little nutty." My family and I appreciated that, but then it just became insulting how they made musicians look. If you are going to have an actor pretend to be a musician, PLEASE study it. It just becomes insulting after a certain point and no longer funny. It was enjoyable though to see my parents expression on there faces while watching it, maybe they will finally believe me that Monk is a better show!

Summer...

Yup, it is definitely summer now. I am so bored, I really should go to bed, but I don't want to. I am so used to staying up this late because I have to. Now I have no reason to. I need a project!

Today I got to spend some quality time with my mother though. Well we cleaned out the laundry room and the shed but we still talked. I have really missed my mother while I was at school. It is so easy to talk to her. Anything that had been bothering me lately she knew exactly what to say to help me calm down and just let God take care of it. She posts note cards on my bathroom mirror with Bible verses on them and they definitely help keep me going. I am so blessed to have a mother that listens and even though we can drive each other crazy at times I would be so lost without her. Then we watched a movie together and continued to talk about whatever was bothering us, getting to talk to my mom was the best part of my day, I have really missed talking to her like that.

And now since I am bored out of my mind I guess I should go to bed instead of staring at my computer praying for something to do.

Friends to the Rescue

Today started off wonderfully! I slept in and once I woke up I made myself breakfast. I call it Death by Pancakes. It was two pancakes with chocolate chips in-between them then whip topping, pecans, coconut, and more chocolate chips on top. I probably consumed my entire days worth of calories in that one sitting but it was so worth it!

Later in the day I met up with one of my oldest friends from grade school, Reina. We talked for hours and hours about school, old high school things, band, and anything else that seemed to come to our minds. I hadn't talked to her in ages so we basically filled each other in on our lives for the past year. Reina has always been a good friend to me, since the very beginning. In third grade was when we became friends, granted we drove each other crazy, we eventually became close friends. We had so much to fill each other in on, I had never gone so long without talking to her so this time with her was much needed.

After we had talked for around 5 hours we decided to watch a movie. Eventually we settled on The Illusionist which she had never seen before. It is such a cool movie! I can't say a lot about it without giving away the movie, but you just have to watch it. It seems a little boring at first but the end is what makes it so brilliant!

I truly believed that these first few days of my summer break were going to be incredibly boring because Grant is still stuck in school and my parents are working. But Reina and Hannah have definitely come to my rescue! They are such amazing people and I am so fortunate to have them in my life.

Old Friends and Disney

So for my first full day at home I have done practically nothing! I really miss at school being able to spontaneously go hang out with people. No matter where you go, if you are bored you are able to run into someone. Now that I am home you actually have to hunt people out. Luckily I am not the only college student suffering from this. My friend Hannah from high school seems to be suffering from this disorder also so we had a spontaneous dinner plus watching of Tangled date! It was lovely! We talked about our years, crazy professors, how adorable the movie is, and just whatever else came to mind. I have really missed seeing her around, we were always buddies in the clarinet section at high school and she was such a wonderful support when I was section leader. Without her constant support and willingness to follow my leadership, I am not sure if the rest of the clarinet section would have listened to me. But she was always so enthusiastic about listening to me when I had to do sectionals or give orders to the section. I really appreciated that and she has always been such a wonderful friend.

We were originally going to just go out for coffee but then I found out that she had never seen Tangled!!! If you are reading this and have never seen it, stop reading this and go rent it! It is such a cute, sappy, corny movie that will just make you happy. It is so Disney, but you can NEVER grow out of that. You can never be too old for a cheesy Disney film! For the most part they have the same(ish) cute plots but for Tangled, it is adorable. My favorite part of the film (yes I am about to talk about the film so I meant it when I said stop reading this and watch the movie if you haven't) is when she finally runs away from home and is having this emotional war with herself. Everyone has gone through that torment, when they rebel against their parents (even if it is smaller than running away from home). I know I have, I will be so enthusiastic and excited then very quickly drop to feeling like a horrible person. Even if it is a very small rebellion it is so funny how emotions can change so quickly. Did Disney capture it perfectly or what! And in general it just makes you happy, I don't really know how else to describe the movie. But it just makes you smile.

Disney plus getting to see Hannah equals a much better day then I expected my first day back! I was expecting boredom and unpacking. This was so much better!

Home Sweet Home

I am back home! And just in time to see my mother for Mother's Day! I have such a wonderful mother and for Mother's Day we got her Secondhand Lions (because the copy we already has was mine and I kept it with me). So of course we had to watch it, I love that movie. It is so funny and sweet! Every time I watch it I think of the time I saw it for the first time. I saw it with Grant, Sarah, and Stewart and throughout the entire movie Grant and Stewart were plotting that they were going to be those old men shooting at fish and fighting teenagers when they are old.

What I was extra excited about today was I got a home-cooked meal! The cafeteria at school isn't horrible, it's just not home cooked. It is very much 'cafeteria food' so today when my dad made grilled salmon, rice, and sauteed carrots, broccoli, and onions. It was so good. I have really missed real food.

I would love to make this post longer but I now have to unpack because I currently cannot enter my room. I did not remember taking that much stuff to school.

Graduates of 2011

Today is my last post from this dreaded dorm room! I love college but I will say, don't like the dorm I am living in. I am all packed and ready to go back home!

It was also graduation day. Even though I was not one of the ones getting to put on a cap and gown, I attended both services. I could tell you that I wanted to go (which I did) but the main reason was commencement band and I got paid to go. It was nice though, I would have done that for free. Many of those people who walked the stage today have impacted my life in just one year. Watching them graduate was special for me. Everyone that has mentored me and listened to me that walked the stage today I will miss terribly! But I know it is time for them to move on and impact someone else's life.

I would love to list off all the graduates that mean so much to me but frankly I don't have a lot of time and need to wake up early to dust and vacuum my dorm before church. So I will just recognize two.

Kayla, my 'aunt'. She has done so much for me and has been there for me when I was stressed, upset, and can always make me laugh. In marching band she always made sure that I fit in and is always herself. I know that sounds like such a silly thing to mention, but too many people are not themselves by trying to blend into the crowd. She cares about everything and everyone, rarely putting herself first. Thank goodness she will be here next year for graduate school!

The other graduate I want to mention that has done so much for me is my GBig Ashley. In my book she has accomplished more than anyone else I know. She double majored in the honors college and the way she presents herself I have so much respect for. In a very selfish way I am envious of all she has done because I know I could never accomplish everything she has done, but I look up to her so that I know that no matter how high I set a goal it can be accomplished. Unfortunately she will not be here next year, some where else the need her wonderful personality. I will miss her greatly but I know where ever she is she will accomplish amazing things. She has taught me to never give up, hard work always pays off, and just like Kayla- always be yourself.

In high school I could tell a lot of friends were never true to themselves. I tried to avoid it but I know it was hard for me to be 'me'. Thanks to Kayla, Ashley, and many other graduates have made this year wonderful. I have found 'me' and I pray that for the next three years I can impact others as much as the graduates of 2011 have impacted me.

The Awkward HP Guy

Well I failed at updating this on yesterday :( I was so distracted packing that by the time it got around to two in the morning I forgot.

Today was mostly packing and I am proud to say it is practically done even though I am not leaving until Sunday. I also managed to pack everything except the few things I didn't have the heart to pack up. My two bulletin boards with the notes I keep on them and four picture frames. It just feels like if I pack them away and have to stay in this dorm it's like forgetting everything that has happened this year. Those notes and pictures are some represent some of the best memories I have had this year and if I have to sleep in this tiny, white-walled dorm I need something out that is going to make me smile.

The other thing that I did today was call HP (again) about my laptop keyboard and goodness, the guy I talked to was the most awkward guy I have EVER talked to. Granted that might be a strategy they have so I didn't yell at them for not fixing my laptop the first time. But when he is telling me that he didn't want to put me on hold because he hates the music and wants to use it torment his daughter so she will clean her room. Currently though he uses his "Back in the day" stories to punish her, then he went on to tell me that he was worried that child protective services might think he was torturing her by telling her those stories. I believe he went on to tell me some stories, but I was biting my tongues so hard from saying some snide remark. How do you respond to those stories? Then he went on to tell me that he was filling out the forms for them to get a full inspection (it didn't before!?!?!) and how he didn't care that the people who were inspecting it were going to hate him. Ummm... thanks? Isn't that your JOB? Yeah, I had no idea how to get respond to anything this guy said. But hopefully since he seemed to not care how much the inspection people hated him my laptop might actually get fixed.

Scrapbook

I love my family! They are so great. I talked for almost two hours with them on skype today. I know I will see them in a couple days but seeing getting to hear from them today was wonderful. Exams days are so slow, no one is around, and nothing is going on. Getting to talk to them was great. I got to ramble on about everything that was going on in my life, I am not sure if they understood it or not, but they listened and still had me smiling.

I also shall never get my packing done. I picked up the a scrapbook for TBS today (that was made for 2010-2011) and even though I have seen it before I can't stop flipping through the pages. Besides music the only other hobby that I have that has stuck with me for years is scrapbooking. As I have mentioned before I love pictures and picture frames so it makes sense that I scrapbook. A scrapbook captures more then a picture though, it allows you to put an 'essence' to it (I know this is SUPER cheesy but I can't find a better way to word this). Looking through this scrapbook I feel it represents every single part of TBS, it captures who we are as a group. Hopefully I will soon feel like I have memorized the book so I can put it down and finish packing away things (which is horribly depressing).

My Last Words to Physics

Dear the world who reads this blog,

PHYSICS OF MUSIC AND SOUND IS OFFICIALLY OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I would like to thank everyone for putting up with me during this time in my life. I am NOT a physics person, by any means. It is like another language for me that I cannot learn. I tried in high school, I have now tried in college, I just need to accept that it is never meant to be.

I have great respect for those who can understand physics like my grandfather. I am not sure how he does it, but he knows physics. Never will I, Meridith, change the world through physics. No one can say I didn't try either. I have survived AP Physics and now Physics of Music and Sound. I have tried, I have put in my effort, and I am proud to say I have finished physics.

I do not believe is was a strong win over physics because I will never take anything like it again. In high school I told myself once I finished AP Physics I would never put myself through that torture again. Well I was weak and stupid this year. I broke that promise and signed up for physics. Now that it is over I am making this promise to all of you- I WILL NEVER TAKE PHYSICS AGAIN! Please hold me to that, I do not want to forget how awful I am at this.

I would love to blame the professors on my unsuccessful record in physics and as much as I want to I will have to blame myself. I do not believe I had the best professors, but this is two separate physics classes that I was terrible at. I didn't fail either of them, I just hated it. NEVER LET ME PUT MYSELF THROUGH THIS AGAIN!

This will be my last complaint about physics. This will never be a subject matter again for this blog. I am saying goodbye forever to physics! I would love to type more complaints, but I feel that would just be redundant and just plain unnecessary. But please my only request: NEVER I mean NEVER let me take physics again, that is not how I am going to change the world.

Sincerely

Meridith

A Picture

Studying.... all day. I just have to keep telling myself it will be worth it in the end. And it really isn't that bad, I just have so many more things in my life I would rather do then study physics.

I also need to start packing. I am avoiding this process at all cost though because I know the first thing that I will probably have to pack away, my picture frames. This will most likely not be my only post on picture frames because picture make me happy. I have 13 pictures either framed or laid out on my desk so I can see them and then another 8 on my wall. I just don't have the heart to take them down. If I take those down it is no longer home for me. A single picture can capture so many emotions, they can capture your happiest moments, they can also capture things you want to remember about yourself. One picture that I have on my wall is a picture of a clarinetist that I was in band with in high school named Brian. I have never met anyone like him. I was a senior when I met him and he was a freshman but he taught me more then I could have ever taught him. I might have taught him about music and band but he taught me something much more valuable: how to cherish every moment.

A little background for those who are extremely confused Brian has muscular dystrophy and is confined to a wheelchair. That wheelchair did not stop him from being in marching band though. He had an electric wheelchair so he moved himself, he was not going to be pushed. Brian would call out counts, play with his free hand, and show up on the field at 7 in the morning with a bigger smile then anyone else there. I was so honored to be his section leader. He taught me so much by getting to march next to him during halftime and sit with him at football games. Brian is such an inspiration- he never lets anything get in his way and he has the best character!

The picture I have on the wall is from when I went to a football game after I graduated. It has several of the other clarinetists, Brian and then me. Even though I was a graduate he was still excited to see me and asked me about school, what was knew, and how I was. I didn't know I made an influence on him, all I knew was he influenced me. Every time I look up at that picture I remember how I need to strive to have a positive attitude in everything. If Brian doesn't give excuses I really don't have one. Even though I am not at my high school anymore I know he is impacting so many people. It is hard not to be amazed with him.

I know this post was super random but that picture makes me really happy (as do all of mine but those are for a different day). But every picture, letter, and figurine on my desk has a story- something that defines me. I can't pack it away yet. I need these memories to get me through exams. So today I want to thank Brian because even though it is totally random but looking at that picture keeps me going when I am dead tired and sick of studying. I put on a smile and keep going. It's surprising that something as simple as a picture can do that.

Who Has Told Every Lightning Bolt Where It Should Go?

Long long long day. It was one of those days were I wasn't sure what I was going to blog about.

The dorm I am in is really cold, all the time. Outside it is probably in the 60s and it is colder in my dorm. I have sweat pants and my hoodie on yet I was still shaking. I was dizzy, stressed, and getting quite frustrated with myself. Then I found my corn bag! So I microwaved that for a bit and I feel so much better. I know that is a really strange thing to blog about but it reminded me not to worry about the small things.

One of the biggest things I promote to everyone when things are stressful is to not worry about the little things. God will always provide, even if it is not the way I intended, God's way is always better. I was stressing over such stupid things that every little thing was bothering me. It felt like nothing was going right for me, but I failed to take my own advice and just let it go. Just go with it, not to worry. I have no control over some things in life no matter how much I want it.

Now I can hear the thunder outside and it is so calming. God is so amazing. "who has told every lightning bolt where it should go?" That is from my favorite song Indescribable by Chris Tomlin. If I put the lyrics to that song on here I could type forever and unfortunately I still have some studying to do. But basically God chooses where those lightning bolts go and he still has the time to worry about me. So why should I be stressed? He is Indescribable, I shouldn't forget about the wonderful moments I have had today because I got stressed temporarily.

Once I found my corn bag and felt better I got so much done too! I wrote my clarinet outline, finished reading for my english class, finished studying for theory, and now have started studying for religion. I even had time to eat dinner! It may have been unhealthy (ramen noodles, apple sauce, and mint chocolate chip ice cream) but I have a week left of my freshman year and I didn't gain my freshman ten, if anything I lost weight so I figured it doesn't matter.

I can do it, I won't let the little things get to me. No need to worry, I just do what I can, and let God handle the rest.

Liam Neeson Can Make Anything Epic

Well my internet is horrible so was unable to update this last night. Besides my internet failing at life it was one of the best days I had had in a while.

                                        

My day started off well when I got to go to the TBS/KKY pool party, I didn’t swim I just hung out and talked but that was well needed compared to being shut up in my dorm all day. TBS announced the new officers and a few awards and I shockingly got Tau of the Year! I am so honored to have this, because to me it means I am doing something right for the chapter. Everyone that was nominated for this award (and everyone that wasn’t) I believe contribute a lot to the chapter but something I am doing apparently makes me stand out. I have never been the person that is set apart; I have always worked hard but blend in with the rest of the crowd. It means so much that the chapter believes I am doing so well, they have truly made this year amazing and I don’t know how I will survive the summer without seeing them all the time.

After the pool party I got some studying done (finally!) and then Grant came down for dinner! He can’t come this week on his usual Sunday because of work problems so instead we hung out on Saturday. We picked up Chipotle and took it to the park for a picnic. It was so pretty outside and the food was really good. Then we Redboxed a movie, we didn’t see one that we really wanted to see on it so I picked one at random. So at random we ended up watching The Last Three Days staring Russell Crowe and it was actually really good. It was about a guy trying to break his wife out of jail because she was going to be put away for life for a murder she didn’t commit. I have seen better movies but for picking one at random I thoroughly enjoyed it.

To make the movie better though Liam Neeson was in it and gave this epic speech about escaping out of jail! I am pretty sure he can make any speech epic though. He just has one of those voices that whenever he talks you know it is a big deal and it is so much fun to hear him talk. Just imagine him saying “I would like a Big Mac, with double cheese, lettuce, pickles, and special sauce” and you have to admit it would be the most epic thing ever! In whatever movie he plays in he just makes his part so cool, so yeah that was definitely my favorite part of the movie.

So basically a pretty awesome day! Minus the internet being dumb but that can’t crush my spirit right now.

Doing Nothing

Today was a little more productive then yesterday, not by much though. I managed to finish my note cards for religion, analyze my theory homework, turn in my recital programs, and start my english readying. Sadly out of all that I should have done a lot more but had a hard time motivating myself. 

Since I have been locked up in my dorm for the whole day today was pretty boring. All I have done is study, distract myself from studying, and went to lunch with my Big Brother (which was very much needed, I was about to go crazy if I stayed in this dorm any longer). So after lunch I attacked my studies, well tried to. Does anyone else have the hardest time doing a small amount of work after you have finished a lot? Apparently I have the hardest time changing pace, now that I am no longer super busy it takes so much longer to get anything done. But I am definitely slowly catching up on sleep! Even though today was boring the more I think about it the more I realize how much I am enjoying being super lazy. I know it is bad to be lazy, but I had forgotten how nice it is to sit in your dorm room with sweat pants on and hair pulled back with Bones on in the background (apparently I didn't learn my lesson from yesterday and still watched several episodes). Even though I was still studying it was relaxing, I was not uptight, I was not stressed about getting it done. My attitude was just 'I will finish when I finish' and that is soooooooooooooo unlike me. I am usually so uptight I drive myself crazy. Granted I probably should spend another one of my dead days or days before finals being this lazy but again (like yesterday) I don't regret it. I have spent so much of my year working, studying, and stressing it feels like I have earned this time off.

My advice during dead days: enjoy laziness (don't be too lazy) and also enjoy doing nothing. Doing nothing is a hard thing to come by this time of the year.

An Unproductive Day

Juries are done! Thank goodness! It could have gone better but there is nothing I can do about it now so I have decided not to worry about it anymore.

Besides completing my jury today has been a horribly unproductive day. I normally have this problem where I try to get too much in one day and become so productive I drive myself crazy. Now I know you are thinking how is that a problem, but you can ask many people (especially Grant) that I hate wasting time. Rarely will you ever see me without homework or something to do, because if I have a second of free time I would use it. Something has hit me these past few days (ESPECIALLY today) where I am enjoying not being productive! I am still getting things done, just not at my normal pace.

Once my jury was done I lost all motivation for the day, I figured I have worked so hard I deserved a break. I did not intend for my break to last as long as it has but I will blame that on watching Bones (thank you Big for getting me addicted to that). But you know what? I don't regret being so unproductive. I still got some studying done, but I have not been stressed at all today. Which says a lot about me considering I had a jury today. I am normally super high strung on days I have performances and especially after I finish playing. In high school I would just tear apart my performance driving anyone who would listen to me crazy. I am so proud that I was able to let it go and just have fun with my day.

I didn't realize how much I needed this day. From 5 until 10 I did no school work, no practicing, no worries. Instead it was painting my nails, looking through scrapbooks/pictures, and Bones! There is no need to continuously work. Where is the fun in that? I love being productive and getting things done, but the human body and mind can only take so much. Today was my day to reboot and I am ready to attack my notes again tomorrow! I got a pretty decent start today but I have learned my lesson: if I want to get things done do NOT turn on Bones. But I do not regret my unproductive day- everyone needs one.

Highlights of my Freshman Year

Today was my last day of classes for my freshman year. That is such a bitter/sweet thought. I have loved my freshman year and I have been so fortunate to have the best freshman year. Since I have only had this blog for a week it tells little about my freshman year and why it was so awesome so todays post is for the highlights of my freshman year (in no specific order).  

1.       Making it into the top concert band: That was my top goal at this university and I never expected it to come true. I was worried for the whole summer that I would not make it and had already begun to believe that I wouldn’t. I wanted it so badly but had so little confidence in myself. When I saw my name on the list for being in the wind symphony I didn’t believe it, I had to actually ask someone else where my name was because I thought my eyes were playing a trick on me.

2.       Carnegie Hall: The reason I wanted to be in the wind symphony so badly was because they were going to play in Carnegie Hall! A few hours after I found out I was in wind symphony it hit me- I WAS GOING TO PLAY IN CARNEGIE HALL! I know once it finally hit me I had the hardest time sleeping that night because I was so excited. And that was only around a week into my freshman year! I knew from that point that this year was going to be incredible.

3.       Rosebowl: I don’t even know how to describe this! I got to go to the Rosebowl!!! When I was an 8^th grader I missed marching in the Rosebowl parade with my high school band because I was a year too young. I was so upset, I had never wanted to go on a trip more. But on my first year in college I finally got my chance! Not only to march in the Rosebowl parade but to be there for the game and cheer on my university to a victory!

4.       Grant: He has been in my life since before my freshman year but I know I couldn’t have made it through without him. He continuously supported me, listened to me, and took me to church every Sunday!

5.       Marcellus mouthpiece: This is a super nerdy thing but I had bought a really nice mouthpiece off ebay that is normally a hundred dollars for $15. Yeah, that was exciting.

6.       Visits to UNT: I am blessed with some wonderful friends that let me stay at their dorm when I go and visit Grant. It has been so nice when I see them and get to catch up. Sarah and Denise you are awesome! I can’t thank you enough for putting up with me those random weekends.

7.       Big: I am a member of Tau Beta Sigma the honorary band sorority. Meeting my Big Sister, Audrey, for the first time has to be a highlight of my year! It is so funny to think that I had never spoken to her before I knew she was my Big. She has made such a huge influence on my life and is such a wonderful supporter. This semester has been stressful but she has always been there for me. The moment I found out she was my Big I knew this was going to be one of the best things that could happen to me in college but I didn’t realize how incredible it was going to be.

8.       Any moment with my Pink! family: I am in the greatest family ever. This year Audrey, Ashley, Kayla, Callie, and Julie have become a part of my life. Those girls never fail to make me smile. They encourage me to be my normal quirky self and still love me. I never would have expected a few months ago that I would have a group of girls that mean this much to me. These girls are amazing and any moment I spent with them was definitely a wonderful moment in my first college year.

9.       Route 66: For those who know this story you are probably surprised that I am putting this story, but I find it very funny now that it is over. I was headed back to school with Grant and a friend. We were in Oklahoma, middle of nowhere part of Route 66 then the car breaks down. So I decided to be productive when I was stuck on the side of the road, I practiced! I learned my minor scales on the side of Route 66, I say that is something worth remembering.

10.   Getting on the Today Show: When I was in New York to play in Carnegie Hall, my mother was determined that one of the mornings we try to be in the crowd on the today show. I woke up at 4:30 in the morning, it was freezing outside, and we waited around for hours but it was so worth it! I was directly between the anchors, literally right in between them when the cameras came out! It was so cool!

11.   Getting to know my sisters: The girls of Tau Beta Sigma have done so much for me. Out of all the wonderful things that have happened to me this year having these girls in my life is definitely one of the top things. Every single one of them have made such a big impact on me and encourage me to be a better person.

12.   Going to the march in the Superbowl: Yes, I got to march in the Superbowl, enough said.

13.   Marching Band: I loved marching band in high school, but college was such a different experience. I have been able to meet some wonderful people and go to most football games. I didn’t realize how much I loved marching band until I thought I wasn’t going to do it in college. Luckily I had to do it and I am so glad I did marching band definitely some of my greatest memories.

14.   Being a nerd: It is so nice being around other people who love music like I do. In high school many people didn’t understand my passion for it, but this year I have learned so much from other students who have the same passion I do.

15.   My first day at band camp: I clearly remember meeting Shelby that first day, her warm and welcoming spirit made me realize I made the right choice for college. I knew from that first day that this was the place I was meant to be.

There are so many other memories for this year, those are just 15 of the hundreds of reasons why I had the best freshman year! I would love to see someone else top it, because having a year as seamless as this one has been is absurd. But it did happen! God has blessed me beyond my imagination in such a short time frame that I am having such a hard time soaking it all in. Never did I think my freshman year would end up as it did. 

Russell Stover French Chocolate Mints

Today I finished my last lecture in Physics of Music and Sound! It feels so great to be done with a class that the Almighty never wanted me to take. How do I know the Almighty never wanted me to take it? Well let's just say I have never felt so defeated by a subject. AND I NEVER HAVE TO SIT THROUGH THAT LECTURE AGAIN!!

All I have to do now is survive the final for that class, I can make it! It is so nice to know I made it through. Now I am enjoying the moment of no physics ever again by eating Russell Stover French Chocolate Mints which are the best chocolates EVER! If you have never had them before you are missing out. These things are so good! I have been fond of these chocolates since I was really little. My mom and I would go out and run errands so we would happen to stop by Brookshires and get a candy bar (French Chocolate Mint). Sadly enough they no longer make it in the candy bar form but when it is a box of chocolates they never fail to make me happy.

Broken Keys on a Computer Keyboard

I have a keyboard that works!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

If you are a little confused my laptop has been going through this phase where it does not want to let me type any 'g' 'h' or use the backspace key. It makes typing papers take forever and replying to emails a real pain. I am now a dork and have a keyboard that plugs into my laptop but I don't care right now, all of the keys work and I was able to type two papers in less then an hour and a half!

It's funny to think that out of the many keys on a keyboard when just a few are messed up it seems to ruin the whole keyboard. It's a little like life (yes I am making another life analogy), when a few things go wrong I know I am guilty of thinking that everything is bad when in reality it is just those few dumb keys. The whole keyboard is not bad, I am rather fond of my laptop keyboard. Life is just so busy I can't take it in to get it fixed (I have already done it once, they failed on fixing it). If you can't fix the keys right away don't let them keep you down! Life can be crazy but when those few things in life seem to make you think everything is going wrong I personally need to stop and realize that my life is actually wonderful- those keys are not that important. Why should I let those few broken keys win? This keyboard isn't bad, just those few keys and all it needs is to be fixed- for me to bring more attention to it when I have the time. Not for me to pout and feel sorry for myself about the broken keys, but instead count the number of keys that work.

I am super tired so I have no idea if that analogy made any sense but this is coming from someone who is terribly sleep deprived and extremely excited to have a working keyboard. So currently I thought that was a pretty brilliant analogy, but I will probably have to end up changing my wording tomorrow when I am thinking straight or I will possibly leave it for your enjoyment to see how my mind works when I am really tired.